The original Superman movie, released smack bang after the double-whammy
of Jaws and Star Wars, was a potent early example of how the blockbuster
formula could result in movies that were both entertaining and expertly
crafted. Directed by Richard Donner, then red hot from his enormous success
with The Omen, Superman was written by Mario Puzo (author of The Godfather)
and counted heavyweights such as Marlon Brando, Gene Hackman and Glenn
Ford among its cast. The score, by Star Wars and Jaws composer John Williams,
remains one of the most iconic and memorable movie themes of all time.
Less than ten years later, and the abusive lover known as Hollywood had
left poor Superman a bruised and battered shadow of his former cinematic
glory. Following a timid reaction to the slapstick tone of the third
movie, most movie pundits figured that Clark Kent had flapped his big
screen cape for the last time. But someone somewhere obviously thought
there were a few more drops of box office juice in the blue tights, and
this appallingly cheap fourth entry squeezed that paltry juice into cinemas
in 1987.
Christopher Reeve returned once more as the Man of Steel, but wanted
to be more involved than merely wearing the costume this time. Thus it
was he who came up with the hopelessly idealistic story for the movie,
in which Superman would finally tackle a real world crisis – the
threat of nuclear weapons.
With the world teetering on the brink of atomic war, and with the Daily
Planet taken over by a Murdoch-esque tabloid mogul (and his insipid yuppie
daughter, played by Mariel Hemingway) Clark/Superman is spurred into
action by a letter from a young boy, who asks the superhero to cut through
all the politics and just make the world a safer place.
Superman does this by taking all the nuclear missiles in the world, putting
them in a giant net and throwing them into the sun. Amazingly, this isn’t
the most stupid thing in the movie.
Obviously, this enforced world peace doesn’t sit well with certain
criminal types and the recently escaped Lex Luthor (played once again
by Gene Hackman, who struggles to keep a straight face) teams up with
three black market arms dealers to put an end to Superman’s meddling
once and for all.
And it’s here we get our tantalisingly brief glimpse of lovely
Brit thespian Jim Broadbent (who would of course go on to star in Hot
Fuzz, Moulin Rouge, Vera Drake, The Chronicles of Narnia and the Bridget
Jones movies)
as Jean Pierre Dubois, a French nuke smuggler stricken with an accent
that sounds more like Pakistani via the Welsh valleys.
Luthor’s plot involves using a strand of Superman’s hair
(stolen from a museum) which he uses to create super-powered protoplasm.
This is then placed inside a computerised lunch box and attached to a
nuclear missile about to be fired. Naturally, Superman intercepts it
and tosses it sunwards. One recycled kaboom shot later, and Nuclear Man
is born – with all the powers of Superman, plus general radioactive
abilities, and the dubbed voice of Gene Hackman.
Sadly, Nuclear Man’s first job is to send Luthor’s erstwhile
colleagues packing, and thus ends Jim Broadbent’s brief sojourn
into superhero adventure, fleeing from a lycra-clad supervillain with
an orange tan
that would
make even Pamela Anderson wince.
Superman and Nuclear Man proceed to tussle for the rest of the movie,
in a series of confrontations that showcase just how low the special
effects had sunk from a series that once made good on its promise to
make you believe a man could fly. Wires are visible in almost every flying
scene, to the extent that the whole enterprise looks more like a puppet
show than a Hollywood blockbuster. During a punch-up in deep space, the
platform that the actors are standing on is clearly visible. And when
Superman and Nuclear Man battle on the lunar surface, rather than the
vast vacuum of space, black curtains can be seen hanging behind them.
Meanwhile, the entire movie is filled with agonisingly bad matte effects,
crudely superimposed over stock footage. It’s bad. Like, Ed Wood
bad.
The climax, for what its worth, finds Nuclear Man inexplicably dragging
Mariel Hemingway into space (where, interestingly, she has no trouble
breathing) until Superman blocks his enemy’s atomic powers by pushing
the moon in front of the sun. He then scoops up Nuclear Man and – oh,
such delicious irony! - drops him into a nuclear reactor, thus making
the world safe for Welsh-Pakistani French arms dealers everywhere.
Need to know: A far cry from the A-list prestige of the original movie,
Superman IV was instead produced by Golan Globus, two Palestinian cousins
whose legendary
B-movie output includes such flicks as the Death Wish sequels, the Chuck
Norris franchise Missing In Action, the American Ninja movies, not to
mention the nude space vampire classic Lifeforce (see: Patrick
Stewart)
and the ludicrous fantasy nonsense of Gor (see: Oliver
Reed).
The supremely
shoddy special effects weren’t the
only concession to the slashed budget. With the pot of money available
reduced to just $17 million, production was moved from New York to the
rather more affordable British town of Milton Keynes.
British car registrations can be seen in the background of many location
shots,
not
least when
Superman visits the UN, which
has been relocated to what looks like a small office block round the
back of a supermarket.
When shown to preview audiences, the reaction was predictably so bad
that almost an hour was chopped from the movie, bringing it down to a
less painful 86 minutes in length, minus credits. The actor who played
Nuclear Man, Mark Pillow, had never worked in movies before – and
never worked in movies again. Following this disaster, it took Warner
Bros almost twenty years to get Superman back on the big screen with
the Bryan Singer helmed Superman Returns which, wisely, pretended that
the previous sequels never happened.
Availability: Superman IV is available as part of the Superman DVD boxset
or, if you really want to punish yourself, as a standalone disc.
